My Boring Blog

Just a blog about me and whatever I\’m thinking at the time. Ho hum.

Take the Clerks Quiz!

Posted by austinburns on July 12, 2006

MSNBC has a cool Clerks quiz in preparation of the sequel soon to be released. I got 100%!! Woo-hoo!

(Via IMDb)


Posted in Movies | Leave a Comment »

Viva Italia!

Posted by austinburns on July 9, 2006

Viva Italia!

Congratulations to Italy for winning their fourth World Cup and their first since 1982!

And a big “BOOOO!” to Zidane from France for some really bad conduct. He came out of retirement to play in this Cup, plus he was the captain! It’s a terrible way to leave the final game.

Go Italy!

Posted in Sports, World Cup 2006 | Leave a Comment »

New Apartment

Posted by austinburns on July 9, 2006

So, I just woke up after my first night in my new apartment! It’s so nice to be without crappy roommates! Hurrah!

Posted in Personal | Leave a Comment »

On the evils of Mallard Fillmore

Posted by austinburns on July 6, 2006

So, after a couple of months of reading Mallard Fillmore disgrace himself again and again in the Opinion section of the Orlando Sentinel, I decided to write to the editors regarding my distaste for the strip. Here is the letter:

Ok, can we admit a mistake? We tried it out, but it’s just not working. Having Mallard Fillmore next to Doonesbury is just embarrassing. Even if you remove the political leanings, Doonesbury has a decent narrative, tying together multiple storylines to tell a story. Meanwhile, Mallard Fillmore “reports” on “current” events. The problem with Mallard Fillmore is by the time he draws the strip and submits it and it’s published, whatever he was writing about has vanished off the political radar. In about three weeks we’ll get the first batch of North Korea missile test “jokes”.

Another problem with Mallard Fillmore is his hypocrisy. Last month, he was shouting for the media to remember, “Innocent until proven guilty,” with respect to the Marines alleged behavior in Haditha. Within a week, he was back on his personal warpath to condemn the U.N. Peacekeepers who have been accused of trading food for sex in impoverished countries. What happened to, “Innocent until proven guilty”?

And, lastly, I was pretty aware that Abu Musab al-Zarqawi was killed. In addition to the Orlando Sentinel reporting that, the “godless liberal” Jon Stewart told me, too. Do the right thing, Orlando Sentinel, get rid of this lame duck.

Here’s hoping it gets published (doubtful). Anyway, I doubt they’ll pull the strip. In today’s paper, they ran this letter:

Thanks for printing the “Mallard Fillmore” cartoons alongside “Doonesbury” on the op-ed page. It obviously is getting under the skin of those on the left who write you with emotional tirades when they view blunt truths they don’t want to acknowledge. The liberal feedback gives me additional laughs following my daily read of “Fillmore.”

Just to put letter writer Patrick Murphy at ease, we on the right don’t get our facts on global warming from a comic strip. We actually look at the complete factual data over a long period of time instead of buying into Al Gore and other liberals trying to find something to work their constituency up into an emotional lather.

I will admit that we have had a global warming trend over the past 25 years, but in the 1970s, scientists were predicting global cooling. If you get past the hype and look at the real facts, you will see that this has been a cyclical issue since the dawn of time.

The real facts are that the “godless liberals,” as Ann Coulter calls them, believe that man is capable of overwhelming this accidental planet that came into being with our big SUV emissions, as opposed to an omnipotent Creator who controls the balances of the nature He brought into being.

Thanks Sentinel. Keep printing “Mallard Fillmore,” and keep the laughs coming.

I won’t even go into the contradictions in the letter. (You admit a warming trend for 25 years, but scientists in the 70’s predicted a cooling? Didn’t you just prove that global warming is happening? How is it a cycle if it’s not getting colder? And what “balances of nature” is he seeing the world? Arrrghh! Whoops. I said I wouln’t go into this.) I’m just surprised that anyone actually likes Mallard Fillmore. I used to lean pretty conservative (growing up in a religious private school and all), but even then, I don’t think I would have liked this comic strip. There’s no subtlety, no nuance, he just bashes you over the head with his ideals. Ok, time to calm down. Rant over.

Posted in Personal, Politics | Leave a Comment »

Summer Blockbusters update …

Posted by austinburns on June 23, 2006

So, I figure we're halfway through the summer movie season, so it's time to evaluate mine and EW's predictions for summer movie dominance.

This list comes from Box Office Mojo. I'm only including the movies that were in mine and EW's predictions:

1. X-Men: The Last Stand $218,806,943
2. The Da Vinci Code $200,824,246
3. Over the Hedge $141,025,611
4. Mission Impossible: III $130,631,596
5. Cars $129,228,871
6. The Break-Up $96,286,810
7. Poseidon $56,796,610

So, I can feel confidant that Poseidon did indeed bomb. Cars stil has some gas (so to speak) to pass MI:III. Superman could run away with it all, depending on how good it ends up being. It doesn't seem that The Break-Up will overtake MI:III, though.

With Superman, Talladega Nights, Pirates, and Miami Vice still to come out, it's anyone's ballgame. Another update at the end of the summer, late September, maybe?

Another interesting table is one for Global grosses:

1. The Da Vinci Code $679,778,601
2. X-Men: The Last Stand $400,243,032
3. Mission Impossible: III $334,585,381
4. Over the Hedge $159,069,192
5. Cars $144,636,871
6. Poseidon $127,596,610
7. The Break-Up $102,927,013

So, Da Vinci rules globally, the Poseidon did much better overseas, and the rest of the world at least tolerates Tom Cruise more than we do. Stay tuned for further updates.

Posted in Movies | Leave a Comment »

The Break-Up

Posted by austinburns on June 7, 2006

The Break-Up

Wow. This movie is NOT a romantic comedy. Even though it is marketed as such, this movie will surprise you. I wouldn't really call it romantic, and a good part of the time is not comedic, either. This movie is brutally real. I have heard the conversations before from first-hand experience. The title of the movie is very appropriate. This movie is about a Break-Up. Plain and simple.

Vince Vaughn is hilarious. He is at his funniest (I'd say) since Swingers. Vincent D'Onofrio is inspired casting as Vaughn's brother. Jon Favreau is really good as his friend. Jason Bateman is good in the few scenes he's in as the couple's realtor. Jennifer Anniston is suprisingly strong in this movie. Joey Lauren Adams is her best friend and is either a psychologist or just someone who reads nothing but self-help books. Justin Long is great as a receptionist at Anniston's job.

The screenwriters did a good job, and I read that Vaughn had a story credit, so kudos to him. The director was Peyton Reed, who also directed Down With Love, another good "romantic comedy."

All in all, a pretty brutal movie, very funny, and very real.


Posted in Movies, Reviews | 2 Comments »

I just wrote my Senators!

Posted by austinburns on June 6, 2006

I’ve never written to my Senators before. That’s probably not a good thing. But, now I can say that I have. I read in the paper that the Senate will be debating a constitutional amendment banning gay marriage on Wednesday. So, I looked them up and wrote them this:

Senator Martinez:

I am writing you to urge you not to endorse the constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage. This ban is an affront to freedom. America was built on principles that every person was created equally and endowed with unalienable rights. I consider the right to marriage to be one of these fundamental rights. Especially in our time, where there are so many benefits to being married, from tax breaks to the ability to adopt.

In America, you are free to do whatever you want to do with your life. You are also free to NOT do whatever you do NOT want to do with your life. If you are opposed to gay marriage, you do not have to marry someone who is gay. That does not give you the right to deny others their rights.

Please think long and hard about your decision.

Thank you for your time.

Here is the link to contact Florida Senators: Click here

I hope this does NOT go through.

Posted in Personal, Politics | 2 Comments »

New DMB song!

Posted by austinburns on June 3, 2006

Woohoo! This is what I love about tour time! New Dave Matthews Band song! If anyone stumbles onto this site, here's a URL for an mp3 of the song: (Since this is an mp3, it goes without saying that you shouldn't trade this around without mentioning that it's an mp3, ok?)

The Idea of You

It's a pretty good song, too. I can't wait to see what they do with it!

Happy days are here again, my friend.

Posted in Dave Matthews Band, Music | Leave a Comment »

Everyman, by Philip Roth

Posted by austinburns on June 1, 2006

Ok, so I finished this book a couple of days ago and have been trying to find it's meaning. So far, I haven't been very lucky. I read it because Slate's podcast is going to be discussing it later this month. It starts out at the main character's funeral, so you know he's dead from the get-go. The book meanders through his life, where he was married and divorced three times. Only one out of his three kids talks to him. He cheated on every wife he had. He alienated his brother. He didn't have very many redeeming qualities.

Am I supposed to learn from this story? Is this a cautionary tale? He didn't seem very sorry for any of his actions. He did what he did, and he couldn't change it after the fact. The only redeeming part of this book was that it was only 180 pages or so.

I'm sorry to say I can't recommend this.


Posted in Books, Reviews | Leave a Comment »

The Plot Against America by Philip Roth

Posted by austinburns on May 27, 2006

The Plot Against America

Wow. What a great book. What a weird book. What a creative book. This book is about what happens when Charles Lindberg wins the presidency at the start of World War II. He keeps America out of war and starts a sort of “Anti-Semitism lite” policy. The story centers around a young boy, Philip Roth (it’s written as kind of a memoir), and his Jewish family living in Newark. His family goes through the best and the worst of the new presidency.

Also, at the end of the book, he gives a true timeline of all the player’s involved. Great reading.


Posted in Books, Politics, Religion, Reviews | Leave a Comment »