My Boring Blog

Just a blog about me and whatever I\’m thinking at the time. Ho hum.

Archive for July, 2006

New blog!

Posted by austinburns on July 22, 2006

Hey, everybody!

Check out my new blog where I review movie trailers!

Hopefully, it will be a good read!

Movie Trailers Reviewed


Posted in Movies, Personal | Leave a Comment »

Ramifications of the Bush “shit”

Posted by austinburns on July 18, 2006

So we all know that President Bush dropped the “s” word (no, not “shut up”) in casual conversation with PM Blair at the G8 Summit in Russia. What I find odd is the various censorship/lack of censorship over the president’s usage of the word. For instance, the Orlando Sentinel printed the word without censorship. However, I cannot find a printing of the word online. The Daily Show, however, allowed the audio to go uncensored, but censored the caption that accompanied the video. CNN and BBC News have also published the word uncensored.
Why is this utterance allowed to go uncensored while Jon Stewart can’t say it without a bleep? Is the president uncensored only because he’s the president?

I have no problem with the president cursing. In fact, I wish he would do it more often. Many situations in this modern world require cursing. Israel and Hezbollah blowing each other up is such a situation. I, too, wish that something could be done to stop that shit.

We will likely not hear very many criticisms of Bush’s speech by the conservatives. If this had been Clinton or Gore or Kerry, we probably wouldn’t have heard the end of it. Why do we tolerate moral posturing?

Posted in Politics, Religion | Leave a Comment »

Superman Returns

Posted by austinburns on July 17, 2006

Superman Returns

What can I say about this movie? If I had to sum it up in two words, it would be “perfectly mediocre.” Everything about this movie was plain. Let’s start with the acting.

  • Brandon Routh as Clark Kent/Superman, thumbs up. I thought he was very believable as Superman. He barely was in there as Clark, but he did good in that role as well.
  • Kate Bosworth as Lois Lane, thumbs up. Ashley didn’t like her, but I thought she was fine.
  • Kevin Spacey as Lex Luthor, thumbs down. I didn’t care to much for him. He swayed between hamming it up and understating the performance. He really needed to either rein it in or overplay the whole thing. Uniformity would have been nice.
  • James Marsden as Richard White, thumbs up. He had a shitty role, but he did well with it. He plays editor Perry White’s nephew and Lois Lane’s 5 year romance and father of her 5 year old kid. Or is he? I really liked the Superman love triangle when it was between Supe, Lois, and Clark. It was intriguing to have a love triangle with only two people. To add a third person means that there’s not much else for Clark to do. That being said, the Richard character was all to predictable, but Marsden brought some empathy to the role, which is all he really could do. At least it wasn’t a cliched love triangle where one guy is a total douche, but the girl doesn’t realize it. Richard is truly a good guy, believes his son is his son, but how can he compete with Superman?
  • Some supporting characters: Parker Posey as Kittie Kowalski, thumbs up. Ashley seems to think that she and Lex were romantically involved, I’m under the impression that Lex likes the man-meat (prison will do that to you). If she and Lex weren’t an item, then her role in the movie is a little less clear. Basically, she’s a henchman (henchwoman? henchperson?), but she’s funny when she needs to be. Sam Huntington as Jimmy Olsen, thumbs up. It’s really hard to screw up Jimmy Olsen. Kal Penn as Stanford, thumbs up. Stanford is Lex’s main techie henchman, and the only one who is not an idiot. Kal did a great job with a role with no speaking parts. His role in the movie has a pretty shitty farewell, however.
  • Lastly, Frank Langella as Perry White and Eva Marie Saint as Martha Kent, thumbs up. Langella was a prefect Perry, even uttering the classic, “Great Caeser’s ghost!” at one point in the movie. A very different contrast to J. K. Simmons and his portrayal of J. Jonah Jameson from Spider-Man. And Eva Marie Saint was perfectly cast as Martha Kent. Hardly in the movie, but played a worried/grieving mother perfectly.

The direction was just there. Maybe I expected too much of Bryan Singer after his masterful directions of X-Men I and II. It seemed that just about any action director could have directed this movie.

The story was also pretty ludicrous. Superman has been gone for five years. No one knows where he went. One day, he just left. Turns out he went looking for Krypton. Lois is super pissed at him for not saying goodbye. Superman saves a bunch of people, including Lois. Lex’s plan involves the crystals from Supe’s fortress of solitude to build a new continent off the coast of New York City Metropolis. Wanna guess how it ends? After Singer turned the X-Men story into a thoughtful allegory of homosexual acceptance, I had high hopes that he would do something similar with the Superman story. There was only one mention of something more. Lois writes a piece titled, “Why the World Doesn’t Need Superman” while Supe was gone. When Superman asks Lois about it, she replies that the world doesn’t need a savior. It’s easy enough to draw a line between Superman and Jesus, and Singer could have used that a little better. He could have articulated the difference between the need of a savior and the want of a savior. Instead, there’s one line, a bunch of shots of Superman ascending into the clouds, and a shot of a fatigued Superman falling to earth with his arms outstretched in a cross-like fashion. Singer dropped the ball.

With the average acting, the directing needing work, and the story needing help, I give it a generous


Posted in Movies, Reviews | 3 Comments »

The Onion’s 10th Anniversary

Posted by austinburns on July 14, 2006

The Onion celebrated their 10th anniversary over the past two weeks by featuring some of their best articles for each year. Here are some of my favorites:

Posted in General | Leave a Comment »

Take the Clerks Quiz!

Posted by austinburns on July 12, 2006

MSNBC has a cool Clerks quiz in preparation of the sequel soon to be released. I got 100%!! Woo-hoo!

(Via IMDb)

Posted in Movies | Leave a Comment »

Viva Italia!

Posted by austinburns on July 9, 2006

Viva Italia!

Congratulations to Italy for winning their fourth World Cup and their first since 1982!

And a big “BOOOO!” to Zidane from France for some really bad conduct. He came out of retirement to play in this Cup, plus he was the captain! It’s a terrible way to leave the final game.

Go Italy!

Posted in Sports, World Cup 2006 | Leave a Comment »

New Apartment

Posted by austinburns on July 9, 2006

So, I just woke up after my first night in my new apartment! It’s so nice to be without crappy roommates! Hurrah!

Posted in Personal | Leave a Comment »

On the evils of Mallard Fillmore

Posted by austinburns on July 6, 2006

So, after a couple of months of reading Mallard Fillmore disgrace himself again and again in the Opinion section of the Orlando Sentinel, I decided to write to the editors regarding my distaste for the strip. Here is the letter:

Ok, can we admit a mistake? We tried it out, but it’s just not working. Having Mallard Fillmore next to Doonesbury is just embarrassing. Even if you remove the political leanings, Doonesbury has a decent narrative, tying together multiple storylines to tell a story. Meanwhile, Mallard Fillmore “reports” on “current” events. The problem with Mallard Fillmore is by the time he draws the strip and submits it and it’s published, whatever he was writing about has vanished off the political radar. In about three weeks we’ll get the first batch of North Korea missile test “jokes”.

Another problem with Mallard Fillmore is his hypocrisy. Last month, he was shouting for the media to remember, “Innocent until proven guilty,” with respect to the Marines alleged behavior in Haditha. Within a week, he was back on his personal warpath to condemn the U.N. Peacekeepers who have been accused of trading food for sex in impoverished countries. What happened to, “Innocent until proven guilty”?

And, lastly, I was pretty aware that Abu Musab al-Zarqawi was killed. In addition to the Orlando Sentinel reporting that, the “godless liberal” Jon Stewart told me, too. Do the right thing, Orlando Sentinel, get rid of this lame duck.

Here’s hoping it gets published (doubtful). Anyway, I doubt they’ll pull the strip. In today’s paper, they ran this letter:

Thanks for printing the “Mallard Fillmore” cartoons alongside “Doonesbury” on the op-ed page. It obviously is getting under the skin of those on the left who write you with emotional tirades when they view blunt truths they don’t want to acknowledge. The liberal feedback gives me additional laughs following my daily read of “Fillmore.”

Just to put letter writer Patrick Murphy at ease, we on the right don’t get our facts on global warming from a comic strip. We actually look at the complete factual data over a long period of time instead of buying into Al Gore and other liberals trying to find something to work their constituency up into an emotional lather.

I will admit that we have had a global warming trend over the past 25 years, but in the 1970s, scientists were predicting global cooling. If you get past the hype and look at the real facts, you will see that this has been a cyclical issue since the dawn of time.

The real facts are that the “godless liberals,” as Ann Coulter calls them, believe that man is capable of overwhelming this accidental planet that came into being with our big SUV emissions, as opposed to an omnipotent Creator who controls the balances of the nature He brought into being.

Thanks Sentinel. Keep printing “Mallard Fillmore,” and keep the laughs coming.

I won’t even go into the contradictions in the letter. (You admit a warming trend for 25 years, but scientists in the 70’s predicted a cooling? Didn’t you just prove that global warming is happening? How is it a cycle if it’s not getting colder? And what “balances of nature” is he seeing the world? Arrrghh! Whoops. I said I wouln’t go into this.) I’m just surprised that anyone actually likes Mallard Fillmore. I used to lean pretty conservative (growing up in a religious private school and all), but even then, I don’t think I would have liked this comic strip. There’s no subtlety, no nuance, he just bashes you over the head with his ideals. Ok, time to calm down. Rant over.

Posted in Personal, Politics | Leave a Comment »